Yes, it’s raining again, same as yesterday and the day before and last week!! So, it a day at the computer, with earphones on, listening to the theme from The Promise (the Channel 4 drama broadcast about middle February 2011 about the British in Palestine).If you have read my diaries in the past, you will know how I feel about that part of the world and this music just brings it out and relives my thoughts and memories. I went to Israel about 3 years ago and while my partner wanted to re visit the Holy sights, I wanted to go to Gaza, the Gollen (can never remember how this is spelt) Heights. We did both (though NOT INTO Gaza, but toured the wall, horrendous). I want to go back but this time I want to stay in Jaffa NOT Tel Aviv…believe it or not they are so close together and I want to see more of the wall, around the West Bank and back again into the Zouk in Jerusalem. Plus time has come to read again ‘Exidos’ and ‘The Haj”. I have an American Lawyer friend who actually goes on the boats when they try to get into Gaza…..so brave, I so admire her, what she does and believes in.

Through the earphones is a right mixture of music..as I say The Promise theme, the background music to the current Volvo S60 advert known as LiberTango, Take That’s latest album, a couple from Texas, Alfie Boe’s ‘Bring him home”, Gary Moore’s ‘Still got the blues for you’.

I am also trying to figure out how to display and photography my sets of postcards depicting the secrets of Andalucia (which I sell at the Wednesday morning market down on Torrox Costa in El Ancla Del Cirilo Bar) as I want to list them on my Etsy shop i.e. www.Etsy.com/shop/abizzyb. I also have in my shop on Etsy a collection of my photographic images……check it out. I am starting another shop there www.Etsy.com/shop/broadberry in which I am going to list all my knitted scarves. I use rather unusual yarns for these.

For those of you wondering about the broken and pinned back hip to leg which happened 14 months ago. I would say I am 95% better, taken a long time, but got there. The remaining 5% is what I will have to put up with I think and is more in the muscles now as I have fibromyalgia alongside the osteoporiasis (!!)……otherwise known as getting old! Still want to go photographing and reporting from a war zone………dream on as my kids would say!

Right, off now, things to do and people to see.

Spring has arrived and with the bedroom window open, yes I really can smell the jasmine. Its beautiful fragrance fills the whole house.

It is a very sunny but rather cool and breezy day here in Torrox today, good for drying the washing though. One of those days when loads of pegs have to be used as when the wind blows down the valley the washing could very easily go flying over the village. It did that once, just after we came to live here and I knew nothing about the winds……….pegged jeans out, next thing they were off over the roof tops just like Mary Poppins. Someone, somewhere had a pair of new jeans land in their lap. Learned my lesson!

Spent a couple of days in Malaga the other week, staying at the IBIS Centro hotel just across from the old part of town. I had cut out from The Olive Press, which is one of the freebie papers here, an advert for a restaurant named Pomelo (grapefruit), so after a drink sitting outside the Cervantes Theatre, that’s where we went for lunch. What a find!! It is fantastic. Sits about 50 covers and owned by a Belgium couple, the decor I would describe as boutique. The food is superb and rather different….you choose three dishes plus a dessert from the menu of the day sheet, dishes like pate of wild boar (delicious) or pastry triangles filled with three cheeses. You think it won ‘t fill you up, by my word it does.

It is one of very few restaurants we say we would go back to and in fact we have been back 3 tiimes as we have found ourselves in Malaga for one reason or another these last few days.

The area Pomelo is situated in is a rather up and coming part of the old city of Malaga. The frontages of the old houses are being kept and it is still retaining its lovely atmosphere. Anyone who used to read Torrox Diaries will know that I simply adore Malaga, it is high on the list of my favourite cities. Before I broke my hip, I was often to be found roaming the back streets, camera in hand (see www.etsy.com/shop/abizzyb for examples of my photography ..not only of Andaluca but also Stoke-on-Trent and Morocco. All for sale). Now the old hip is better, then I will restart my roaming!!!!

If you are ever in the area, then the guide ‘Footsteps through the city of Malaga’ is a very handy addition to your handbag or pocket, it takes you at a very leisurely pace through the old city and tells you all about the old buildings. If interested, contact me on abizzyb@hotmail.com as I sell them for the author at the really reasonable price of 5 euros.

I have decided to think about writing this blog as a diary with no more categories, no more separate headings.

It is ages since I last wrote anything on here, in fact it was May 2010 and loads has happened since then. You will all know that in December 2009 I quite badly broke my hip and then had 12 weeks in a wheelchair.  My latest news is that after 14 months since the accident I am now walking fine albeit with a walking stick, though this is more for my peace of mind than anything else. I don’t think I will ever trust myself not to fall again, but there we go!  life hasn’t and won’t stop for me because of what happened……Morocco was fine in a wheelchair and the UK was also done by using the assistance at airports and allowing myself to go in a wheelchair again.  We have just had 2 lovely days in Malaga (Footsteps through the city of Malaga is a guide to that city of which I will tell you more later) for my partner’s birthday……booked into the IBIS Hotel in the centre and I took him to MY Malaga. Had a lovely lovely lunch at a restaurant I had discovered called Pomelo……and would recommend it to anyone and everyone. As usual I did too much walking and my back and leg were knackered by the time we got home!!

I have not given up on life and I am not sitting on the settee moaning poor old me.  In fact it could be Abu Dhabi in October!! I still really want to go to a war  zone with camera and Blackberry, but difficult at the min with a stick!! However while I have been one legged I have developed a selling site for my photographic images so have a look at WWW.Etsy.com/shop/abizzyb. Plus another way I have been using my time is by knitting rather lovely scarves and these can been seen on the same selling site. 

The weekly market set up with my friend Rachael is also still going on and thriving and you can  visit El Ancla Del Cirilo down on Torrox Costa every Wednesday morning where you will find hand crafted items such as my scarves and photographic post cards, wooden items, embroidered items and loads more. Well worth a visit.

The guide to Malaga I mentioned is "Footsteps through the City of Malaga" a lovely, highly readable pocket/handbag sized guide to my favourite city of Malaga. It gives loads of information about most of the old part and is something you can pick up and put down, you don’t have to do it all in one day. Well worth the 5 euros it costs and available from me on abizzyb@hotmail.com.

EVERYTHING from today i.e. February 21st 2011 is going to be written as a blog. No Catagories, no separate headings. Just as a straight on BLOG.

‘coming out’ and admitting it. So, what makes me grumpy? Lots of things, the list will be endless…starting with

OBESE PEOPLE  (i.e. people over a defined weight) should have to pay an excess same as overweight luggage.

BBC BREAKFAST PROGRAMME, the one where they sit on the settee. It’s getting more like a Nanny state programme…they will be telling us when to blow our noses before long.

CHINESE FOOD…NO it isn’t. It is westernised and adjusted to someones idea of what we would like. If you have lived in the Far East as I have you would know the difference.

MOANING MINNIES of the volcanic ash situation…I admit a large group of people were disadvantaged and found themselves with problems returning to the UK. BUT the others that moaned and complained that the Government should be helping them out.WHY? Stop whinging, sort yourselves out and treat it as an adventure and use your own initiative.

TV ADVERTS for some Law Firms…the ones saying ‘We are lawyers dealing in so and so" No YOU ARE NOT, YOU ARE ACTORS, you are playing a part, you are NOT lawyers

PEOPLE who tell me ‘It is alright for you" WHY IT IS?

TOP GEAR…the programme..3 grown men shouting and showing off and who have to be surrounded by sycophantic idiots with overlaid canned laughter, combined with an occasional bimbo blonde to fulfill the role of token female.

JEREMY CLARKSON…..I worshipped him from afar when I was younger, thought he was sex on legs for years. But grow up elegantly Jeremy!! Having said that, your books and writing are BRILLIANT.

CHINESE WHISPERS..I live in a Spanish village with a growing Ex pat community…Chinese whispers are rife i,e, ‘Send reinforcements, we are going to attack" quickly becomes ‘Send three and fourpence, we are going to a dance"…’nough said.

ISRAEL..I love Israel but I don’t like or agree with what they are doing with regard to their neighbours and the Gaza Strip in particular.

PEOPLE who enquire for holiday rentals saying ‘have you anything available June or July?……WHEN in June or July?  These are the same people who can’t be bothered to tell you if the plane is late.

JEANS…for men….older men….they NEVER fit…why not? Sit and do some people watching..airports are good for this (particularly when waiting for people who don’t tell you the plane is late).  There are some really good looking older men, but do their jeans fit? NO THEY DON"T……the crutch is half way down their legs and their backsides are covered in bunches of denim. WHY????

Life these days is spent in a more UPRIGHT position. Unless you have experienced a disability which has necessitated using a wheelchair, you cannot begin to realise and appreciate just how wonderful and liberating it is to be able to STAND, maybe not evenly balanced and maybe not for more than a couple of mins, but just to stand and be upright. Another moment of sheer bliss.

The wheelchair is kept in the back of the car these days as I never know when I have to say ‘sorry, can’t do it today’, but I AM striving to be up on my own legs/hips as much as possible.  IKEA is still one of my best places to shop – they have available wheelchairs for the use of, though being of a slight build and only 5′ tall their chairs are too heavy for me and I prefer to use my own wheelchair as I can get myself around fairly quickly (hence the broken rib a month after I broke the hip!).

My days are still not all good ones, some are still bloody awful.  Days when I can use the leg/hip and days when it has to be rested completely and days when I cry for no reason and feel a complete waste of space – but these days pass.  I know I push myself too far, to go through the pain, but a lot of this is to simply satisfy other peoples opinions, but sometimes I can’t get through that barrier even to please them  These are the people who consider themselves either members of the medical profession and they tell you that ‘they say you have to be up and moving around i.e. 4 weeks after breaking a hip and the day after breaking a rib?  Or the keep fit brigade who insist on telling you about exercising….excuse me, isn’t that something the consultant should be telling me. Neither of these groups ever listen to you and what you are trying to say and they even make their comments ‘over you’ to someone standing near.  These ‘well intentioned’ (HA!) people  know nothing about me, what my pain tolerance is, what I have done and what I have been told officially, they know nothing of the fact that I have myself worked on a Surgical Ward and also in an Operating Theatre and I know precisely what had happened and what the prognosis is. They know nothing of that fact that I prefer to let my own body advise me as it surely knows what it needs. The ONLY thing these people produce is rather dangerous advice and the ability to deliver guilt.

I mentioned before that for the next 4 years I have to take a weekly dose of strong calcium.  Before I decided to take this, I did my own research into the pros and cons of the substance which seemed long term to be fine. But one aspect NOT mentioned was that it would send me to sleep!! Sometimes I sleep most of the day after I have taken it! Got it sussed now though…get up in the middle of the night, take it and go back to sleep, waking up then at a decent time.

As with most things in life, the eventual break came with no warning, no lightening strike, no premonitions – crack! Quickly followed by shock, fear and total disbelief!!

My hip had broken…or, to be more precise..it was the top of my right femur, just below the ‘knuckle’ part that fits into the hip socket which had snapped.

And who do I blame? The owner of the dog which had shit on the pavement…I am not going to beat about the bush – it wasn’t poo, nor a’ mess’, it was shit…fresh and loose. And I had slipped on it.

Read on…to view a letter I had published in one of Gibraltar"s newspapers – a mornings shopping? I think not, not on that day

 
"I address this letter to the dog owners of Gibraltar…please clean up the s..t (mess) left by your animals…BUT in particular I am addressing the owner of the dog who walked their animal along the pavement on the opposite side of the road behind Morrison’s’ Petrol Station.  I crossed the road using the pedestrian traffic-light system, reached the other side and slipped on some rather fresh s..t, breaking the top of my femur and putting the hip out. DATE Friday 11th December 2009 TIME approximately 10.15am/10.30am.
 
Because of your sheer irresponsibility my quite active life has gone on hold – NO walking for 6 weeks minimum for a start, having to conduct my life hopping on one leg, using a walking frame and sitting in a wheelchair, knowing that I have only a 65% of complete healing.  I am normally in control of a few businesses…acting as a ‘fixer’ between clients, I am a freelance photographer, plus co-managing weekly Craft markets.  None of these activities can be successfully achieved hopping around for five minutes maximum on my left leg.
 
I trust YOU will have had a very merry Christmas and will be looking forward to a very healthy New Year!
 
To conclude, I want to publicly praise and say thank you to 1) the three women who rang for the ambulance: 2) the man who wiped the s..t (mess) from my trousers: 3) Jenny and partner, the crew of the ambulance and last, but most certainly not least, to the staff of St. Bernards Hospital and to give praise for the expertise of the A & E Unit, but especially to the surgeons and staff of Dudley Toomey Ward for taking care of me – an active 67 years old female, who lives a two hour drive away in Spain, who only came down to Gibraltar for a mornings shopping.  And finally – to thank my life partner who is going way beyond his call of duty!!"

6 WEEKS LATER…..and no weight has gone down on that right leg…the left leg has got much stronger and likewise my upper body strength. I have been using a walking frame and also a wheelchair…and many other adventures and incidents have happened.  Three days after I arrived home…well not quite home as our house has two flights of stairs in it and no use when hopping on one leg and maneuvering a walking frame. So instead I moved downstairs into my rental house CASA SANDRA (see www.Spanish-hols.com) as this is all only one level and easier.  In the first couple of weeks I had to have 10 injections to stop thrombosis…….luckily we have a friend who worked in the UK as a nurse and he came every day to administer these (the Health centre thought John could have done this….they may have thought but I certainly didn’t!). Then Xmas Day arrived..otherwise known as the Day of the Wimp..which was D Day for taking staples out of my leg. I was terrified and all to nothing.I didn’t feel a thing!…and apparently I have ‘a lovely scar, the surgeon did a brilliant, clean and neat job! Maybe I should show it off at a couple of euros a time!

I took to the wheelchair like a duck to water….to well in fact..I broke a rib doing handbrake turns and speeding!!  Still, one battles on and a couple of weeks ago we went out a couple of  hours drive inland (no, not totally in the wheelchair!) to have lunch with some of J’s friends who he met while covering a week of hard running which his son did…J acted as one of the stage controllers. It was lovely weather when we set out but after an hours driving we were into snowy fields and icy roads. On the return journey we hit a blizzard and the car came off the road into a ditch!  No harm done to the car or J or me…we were pulled out backwards which was when I lost control and became a total whimpering heap…..heading backwards towards the other side of the road which had a unguarded drop of god knows how many feet was staring me in the face and was not where I wanted to be! All the shock of the unresolved breaking of the leg plus heading backwards to who knows where had finally got to me…I was a whimpering mess.  We eventually arrived home some 5 hours later having hit a tailback of at least 1 1/2 hours on the motorway.  I can assure you that it took 4 duvets and 2 pairs of socks to get that leg warm again!

Any road up, all is on the mend now, ribs on the mend and hip coping.

The main problem has been getting out of the house and up a very steep cul de sac in the wheelchair.  It is impossible for J to do it alone which means someone has to asked to give him a hand……my local nurse is mostly on hand for this and it then becomes hilarious as I am giggling all the time. The SMART car can be got to the top of the cul-de-sac which is brilliant and once in it the world then becomes my oyster again and IKEA in Malaga has once again become my stamping ground.

If ever you want to learn how to cope with being in a wheelchair then get yourself to any IKEA…it is the best shop to take yourself shopping…wide isles, good for turning, helpful staff, wide lifts, large toilets for the disabled….

A couple of things I have noticed about being wheelchair bound and they are…..most people DO NOT look where they are going, they DO NOT notice you and sometimes when they do they still keep coming and even resent the fact that YOU are in THEIR way. Many people are just the opposite, they are helpful, reach things for you, pick things up for you, smile and open doors.

And I have noticed that in some of the disabled toilets, yes the facilities are really good, BUT the doors are so heavy to open to get in and the same when you want to come out…because the chair itself gets in the way, you have to try and push the door at the same time as propel the chair and it becomes impossible.  

Many places, like restaurants, do not cater for disabled toilet goers….the door frames ain’t wide enough. Some shops, if you want to pay by card, can’t lower the card machine to you to tap in your PIN number and some shops don’t tidy up, leaving bits and pieces all over the floor.

Plus..things to think on when you break your leg…… wear something with pockets in as you can always pop bits and pieces into them when hopping around on the other leg and using your walking frame……..always put your knickers on the broken leg first, then onto the good leg and when taking the knickers off, the good leg comes first and then the broken leg…and the same with trousers!

Always (if you are female) wear your makeup, especially the old eye shadow etc………..flirty eyes and a smile works wonders and makes miracles happen.

I have a doctors appointment tomorrow to arrange the 6 weeks x ray to see how it is healing and what minimum exercise (if any yet) can be done.  I WILL KEEP YOU INFORMED.
 

‘LOCO’ LOCUM (Doctor)…21 January 2010

My recommended 6 weeks of complete rest for the broken hip is up this week so an appointment needed for the first xray..and this calls for a meeting with my own doctor, who is lovely but is also a training doctor and takes loads of students.

It was one of these students that I saw…I was sitting in the wheelchair before her desk and on stating that I had come to make the appointment for the xray was asked WHY? Well, like Why I have broke my leg and had an operation. Again, Why the xray? Because I have pins in the leg. Again, WHY? You don’t need an xray. Yes I do, No, you don’t. Just get up and walk!!!!!! More or less, take up thy bed and walk………..like NO I have pins in the leg. So, walk and stop being silly you have only had an operation!!!!! Is she mad or what?

Anyway, just as she had done with the four patients before me, she rushed out the room, carrying the paper I had had from the surgeon in the Gibraltar hospital and went downstairs. We came to the decision that she was a really rookie doctor and had to keep asking advice from a doctor on duty downstairs in the Accident Department of the Health Centre. Also, I am certain that also on duty downstairs was the ParaMedic who speaks and reads English…the one J saw when he went down there to arrange for them to take over control of my treatment. We are certain that this ParaMedic told this loco locum to arrange an xray and stop acting as God telling people to ‘Take up their beds’ etc.

Her attitude had changed on coming back into the room and she reluctantly said that she would give us the number of the Nerja Health Centre who do the xrays for Torrox and I now have an appointment for two days time. But she ended up with saying that the plates of the xray have to come back to HER and SHE will then decide if I can see the Trauma (bone) Specialist at the local hospital.

If I lived in the UK I would certainly be putting in a complaint against her, but not worth the hassle here  BUT a complaint will certainly be going in to my own doctor when I next see her.

Keep reading……when I will disclose the results of the xray! (I didn’t think it was worth mentioning to this mad woman that I also had a broken rib (and why) plus I would need xrays at 6 months and also after one year!!!

THE 9 WEEKS SITUATION…February 14th, 2010

The 6 weeks xray was taken and low and behold I have TWO, rather LARGE, like at least 5" long screws in my leg! These go in from the scar on the outside of my right leg and head diagonally towards the groin where they are screwed in… like large screws going into a piece of wood, or something like a builder would use in the construction of a house!

Years ago I worked in a hospital Theatre and know all about the use of Black and Decker drills and super glue..I now have the aftermath of the use of these things in my hip! It’s amazing!

Anyway, on February 8th I had an appointment with my own doctor.and guess who was sitting side of her? Yes, the Loco Locum! Different attitude altogether, yes she could speak English, yes, she was caring and yes she was really nice!!

I have osteoporosis.

The xray showed not only the screws, it showed very clearly that the right hip/leg is transparent..no bone density. The left hip/leg? Fine, at the moment it is as it should be.

Osteoporosis? The invisible disease. I have been avoiding this issue for 4 years. Pushing it to the back of my mind, something that affects other people . I broke my left forearm four years ago and was told then that I had this ‘invisable desease’. I NOW know I have. The xray cannot be ignored. The further risks of accidents, limbs giving way under me cannot be ignored. I left the doctor feeling this is it and this is where I am at.  I can now accept it. It is not going to change my mind on how I deal with the rest of my life. I am still going to have adventures, traipsing round Morocco, returning to Israel, even still hoping to get into the Gaza Strip. I just have to change the ways of doing it. Have you ever read Frank Gardner’s account of what happened when he was shot in cold blood on the streets of Saudi Arabia and how he deals with two useless legs? Brilliant and powering. If he can cope, then so can I…..I only have Osteoporosis, so bring life on. What  I still find hard to accept is the way it happened…..not falling off a horse, not sky diving, not on the front line in a war zone. No, it was dog shit.

The situation now?  I am walking quite good, with one foot in front of the other, using the walking frame. Weight  is starting to go down on the injured leg, I can go up and down two steps,  AND I can do two or three steps using only one hand on the frame. I am doing daily exercises (found on the net written by The Chelsea and Westminster Hospital. PLUS I have an appointment to see the Orthopedic Surgeon at Velez Malaga Hospital on 8th March and I have been put on VERY strong weekly doses of Calcium for at least the next 4 years.

And my next ‘step’! We live at the bottom of a very steep cul-de-sac so when I get out I have get pushed up it in the wheelchair and then get into the SMART car which can get up the steep village streets and can be put at the top of the said cul-de-sac. It is my aim to walk up that cul-de-sac….sideways to start with, holding onto the handrails… looking like a frog! But get up it I will……..Frank would and so will I.

Look in again in a week or so.

end of April 2010

A lot has gone on in the past few weeks – slowly, slowly and sometimes excruciatingly painful and so slow a snail would have rushed past me. But the challenge I set myself at the end of the last entry – getting up the cul-de-sac – got achieved – painfully walking sideways like a crab but ACHIEVED!  It became the first of many personal goals reached….moving back into my own home, tackling to sets of rather steep stairs, getting onto the terrace, pegging the washing out, standing in the shower……… and flying to Morocco!

Moving back upstairs became somewhat of a self-imposed necessity – I decided because I had been living downstairs, that walls needed re plastering/painted/new boiler installed/changing bits and pieces and overhauling the cottage and giving it a fresh and slightly different image – some pink walls here and there and lots of wrought iron work hung around ….Moroccan!!

I had arranged for the builder and  therefore had set myself a deadline – I also wanted a shower! Strip down washes are all very well and just meant reverting to my childhood days spent during the 1940/1950s…no bathrooms, no indoor toilets and not a lot of hot water but no problem either BUT i wanted to feel water running down my back!!, So, jimjams on, out front door,grasp hold of handle on the wall, haul myself up, in our front door, haul self up the first flight of stairs, generally collapse in the bathroom and get under the shower. Oh, the bliss, bliss, bliss it was sheer delight!

And day by day things have been improving. I have now had 3 meetings with the Orthopedic Consultant (each within 4 weeks of each other). I was told to keep weight totally of the leg/hip for another month..and how difficult was that after been used to doing my own thing and trying weight out.  On my next visit I was prescribed a pair of elbow crutches and on the last visit he witnessed me walking with just one crutch (I am a danger to myself and everyone around me if I use th pair).  Early days he said, just now will take time and go easy. Next appointment made for 6 months time..in October 2020.  AND not only do I have two large screws in the hip/leg..I have THREE!! I sometimes say they are breeding and that it is sometimes SO SORE that I think they will BURST out – and make their escape by flying, with all attached blood and gore, over the village!!

Morocco was a great moment – not the first visit for us, more like the sixth – but this time I went in the wheelchair.Great time. Ryanair from Seville to Marrakesh. Help every inch of the way – from the moment I went inside Seville Airport to leaving Marrakesh Airport on our return – security/passports dealt with/total assistance from boarding gates to being carried on and off the aircraft.  Couldn’t have had more proof that you can do anything IF that is what you want to do. I have not found any problems to which I couldn’t find a solution.

So, now I am making a closure on the time since I slipped on that dog shit back at the start of December 2009 AND opening the next phase and chapter of my life …UPRIGHT AND ONWARDS anyway but DOWNWARDS…join me?

I love Malaga….not the new part, not  the airport (though the new one is fantastic), not the western side heading towards Torremolinos. The part I am talking about is the old city, the eastern side, the part where the old bars are, the part with the atmosphere. I love it, love it, love it.

Being a photographer (aka Alex Berry) it is a magical place for me, with the old streets, the run down areas, the parts hidden away, the crumbling buldings. Where your imagination can run wild and where you can sit and dream. I love it!  Many are the times I have caught the bus from the village of Torrox where I have lived since 1992. Arriving at 9.30am in the morning, the whole day spreads itself in front of me. Complete with camera and sandwiches, money in my pocket I have hours in which to just indulge myself in this lovely city.  How I am awaiting until I can do it again because with breaking my hip in December 2009 these trips out alone have been impossible………outings have been taken to the DIY shops and IKEA in Malaga……….couldn’t manage alone in wheelchair and now with elbow crutch BUT soon, soon!

Anyway, imagine my finding something, a booklet, which has added more to my enjoyment of this lovely place. The booklet ‘Footsteps through the city of Malaga’ is just the icing on the cake.  It is a handy size for pocket, handbag or backpack.  It is centred essentially around the old part of the city, starting by the lighthouse and close to the castleand takes you on a walk through the most delightful prts of Malaga, while at the same time bringing together many of the city’s historical, religious andinteresting places……

…..andwhen you need to sit and rest for five, then the booklet presents you with the unusual and sometimes unknown bits of information of the city -tales of shipwrecks, spies and conspirices, burials on the beach, floods and German bridges.

The booklet allowsthe walk to take as long asyou want it to…do it in a morning OR let it take a whole day OR days OR over a period of time…tuck "Footsteps through the city of Malaga’ into your pocet, bag or wherever and take it out again when the mood takes you. And, as the booklet says "just follow the footsteps" and let your journey begin.

And now for the SELL!! The booklet is available from many outlets but why not buy from me? And why from me? Well, as they say..I know the author. Infact had a long coffee break with him only yesterday (May 20th, 2010),talking of many things, including his next guide.

PRICE and details…..5 euros plus post and packing. My details? email abizzyb@hotmail.com or phone 004461711115.

OK, I know what it means and you probably know what it means. But does Bert and Ethel from downtown Stoke?  They have never been abroad before (’cause it’s full of them foreigners), certainly never eaten foreign food ("Give me a bowl of lobby and a couple of oatcakes").

Picture the scene.  Bert’s heard from his mate (they both race Whippets, silk scarves, cold wind, up on the hill) of somewhere called Torrox Pueblo (oh dear, sounds a bit odd already). Could be OK for the Wedding Anniversary, 25th, coming soon, should I risk it, bit of a surprise for the wife? The mate says Give it a go, especially as he says he knows someone who lives there. Someone who is a Pottry lass, you’ll be OK"

Bert thinks he will try and live a bit dangerously and books a week. But, he also thinks he will keep ‘is cap on, pack his ‘anky (white, knotted), socks and sandals, but he wonders if there will be egg and chips.

 Well, the time has come and Bert and Ethel arrive, hot and very flustered.  The mate has already rung me (warned me, more like) – ‘couple of werriters’, keep an eye of ‘em as they worry a bit but show them a bit of what real Spain is all about.  They’re OK, cup of tea sorts them out and when they realise I come from where they do, well I’m well blessed! AND I can even speak the same language! Settle them in, good nights sleep and tomorrow I will walk them through Torrox, show them the hidden squares and corners, the colours, the friendly people, but warn them about the fierce heat of the summer.

This forthcoming 25th? I have decided to take them on a TAPAS TRAIL around the village. Won’t that be a shock? Foreign food? Eaten among a load of foreigners?!!!!!! Oh dear!

Tapas are the small snacks which often accompany drinks (either free or sometimes a small charge). The word ‘Tapas’ originates from ‘Tapa’ i.e. a top and referred to a covering on the top of your drink to stop the flies getting in. Nowadays the word is used to mean the small side dish of food and is usually  served in either a round or  oval ceramic dish.  It is sometimes the choice of the bar man (free) or ordered from a menu of Tapas (paid for). 

The idea/aim of Tapas is to have something to nibble on before your main meal (and to a Spaniard this is around 10pm) and usually in a working class village like Torrox Pueblo Tapas are taken about 7pm, when the man has finished work for the day and after he has been home and had a shower.

The range of Taps is huge and varies between bar to bar, village to village, town to town, Provence to provence. The basic ones are crisps or a chopped salad (sometimes with bits of octopus..oh dear Bert and Ethel!) and sometimes an oyster like shell fish, which the locals swallow raw!  As you enter most bars you will see on the top of the counter a long, dome covered container and it is here you will discover a range of Tapas, all freshly made each morning, usually by the wife of the bar owner.

Anyway, the Anniversary Day has arrived and so have Bert and Ethel, thankfully with no knotted hanky in sight. Though they do look a bit anxious. In the past we have counted 26 bars in Torrox Pueblo, but I am not taking Bert and Eth to all of them, just a couple of ones in the main square and a couple up the older part of the village, maybe hidden behind the plastic curtains. After a drink or two, taking in the walking couples who pass around the square,  a couple of moans at the start from Bert about ‘this beers nowt like The Trumpet in ‘anley’ and Ethel sipping her orange juice, we have arrived at El Capau, a VERY Spanish, VERY working class, few foreigners, bar. where I have known the owning family for years. In fact they taught me a lot of the language, including discussions with the Dad about my love-life and the fact that he thinks I need a Spanish lover! By this time, Bert is getting ready for anything, including trying the beautiful Jamon Serrano (raw ham to most Brits). This is dry aired cured leg of a pig and is really lovely, especially served with one of the very dry Spanish white wines, which even Ethel is having a go at….she does look rather relaxed!!

So, did our pair of intrepid travellers enjoy the night? The answer he gave his mate on returning to downtown Stoke was ‘Bring it on’!!!!

No order, ..many things,.. music,..images,.. thoughts,.. randomness,.. the vagaries of a middle aged woman……..things like:

the clean smell of a baby or my cat who smells just as clean,,,the voice,eyes and hair of Neil Oliver from the TV series ‘Coast’…the sound track of the 2009 TV AD for Mercedes Benz…adventures (I love adventures)…the sound of helicopter rotor blades (thud, thud, thud)…the power, determination,concentration of Rafael Nadal (tennis player)..and the dry humour and New York accent of John McEnroe…chocolate…

I like my own company………..maybe something that comes with getting older, but I am very comfortable being alone, I find contentment in doing my own thing. Perhaps being an only child ‘helps’ because then my friends were dolls, books (and I love, love, love reading) and jigsaws.

Celtic music and northern dialects,..articulated lorries,…slate roofs in the rain in northern England…wind farms…Harrier Jump Jets…the crunch and colour of a wet pebble beach.  Cranes on a building site and the Gantries of Harland and Wolff in Belfast.

I like markets…the ones found in English country towns, craft markets, Farmers Markets. I like them to the extent of running one on the coast. Along with my ‘business’ partner Rachael, we hold a weekly market on a Wednesday down on the beach in El Ancla Bar, Torrox Costa. We have a lovely bunch of sellers, who surprise you with their talent. It has been running now for a few months but WE NEED MORE BUYERS!.

I love the markets in Morocco (where we visit OFTEN) but there they are known as SOUKS. And what a hustle and bustle they are, full of both people and businesses, workshops, water sellers, funerals come through with coffins held high. The colours, the noise..wonderful.

And someone saying "I’ll take you to the end of the world".

………………..there will be more!!!

SOME MORE…

Idris Elba…my newly chosen close body protection officer! He will not be at all conspicious when I am wearing purple with a red hat and spitting in the street! I also love his BBC1′s series ‘Luther’…

…sitting watching the ocean and dreaming…the colours of Morocco…Berber tribesmen wearing turquoise with white turbans…interesting people who do interesting things (like two female middle aged lawyers I know..one of which goes into Gaza and the other helps middle eastern immigrants into Amercia…..and who one would take them to be your aunts)….Germaine Greer and women like her…Andrew Marr (now there is a sexy man..Helen Mrran and I agree on that)