May 20, 2007
He’s a lovely man ………..especially when sober!
As I say, when sober he is lovely, little man…all 5′ft of him is kind, gentle, quiet. No bother, no noise, no shouting, screaming or banging. BUT when drunk he is the same as drunks the world over,
argumentative, noisy, shouting..with added yelling and screaming from the wife. All this at the top of their voices, out in the street, really just your average ‘little domestic’ to be witnessed anywhere. How I wish my spoken Spanish was better, I could tell what they were saying then. But I suppose it would still remain a mystery as the local Spanish, when ‘upset’ (!) speak in a dialect very few foreigners can get a handle on,.Rather the same I suppose as when I speak to my immediate family back in Stoke-on-Trent, because who, except for a native of Stoke can understand Pottry speak?
We’ve known Pepe, his wife Lola and their family (at that time) since we first arrived in Torrox Pueblo, Andalucia, in 1992. They were a lot quieter then and he did seem to be going out to work. Whereas now, he seems to spend his time, when not drunk and in the street, up in the Campo (countryside) where I believe they have some family land. Lola has never looked well to me, not a bit of weight on her and her legs and ankles, well there’s more meat on my cat! I don’t know how her legs support her. Please don’t ask about the state of her teeth (not many) or her finger nails (filthy). But a caring woman,as she demonstrated a year ago when I broke my left wrist and she was in tears when she saw the arm in plaster. When we first met them they had 5 children, but another little one was born after we had been here about 3 years. It seemed to be a family of two halves, the first half being three girls all in their teens, then there was something like a 10 year gap, and then the 3 last children arrived. Very difficult to try and find a way of asking someone who lives around the corner why was there a 10 year gap? Did they live in the same house for those years? Did they never ‘get it together’?(!). Even now my Spanish is a lot better, it is a question I have never really got round to asking. However, I digress. The three younger children, like their mother, were never well, plus the kids all had something the matter problems with their eyes. The older girls all seemed well and quite healthy and are all now married with children of their own, the eldest living in Nerja and the other two living in Torrox Pueblo. Then very strangely about 2 years after the last child was born, all three of the younger children were nowhere to be seen. It seemed that the parents had a long history of drinking and were often visited by Social Services, who it turned out had decided that the younger children could no longer remain in the home and were taken to a place of safety. Word on the street is that the parents don’t know where the children now are, but that they are all together in a very nice and supportive foster home a good way away. The older girls, who by that time, had moved out of the family home, did try and get custody of their younger siblings, but to no avail.
Any road up, as the years past I think both of them upped the drinking stakes, the arguments got more and the shouting and yelling got louder. On really bad occasions our other Spanish neighbours became involved, joining in, sitting on the steps, mulling it all over either between themselves or with Pepe and Lola. It would all get settled and silence would reign for a couple of months. Then it would go off again, he would be holding court round one of the local little bars (holds two standing, guests have to sit outside!),Lola would be hiding round a corner watching and shouting abuse, with the next thing being that you would see her early in a morning coming up from the square carrying bottles of beer for their breakfast. Don’t think much food was bought in that house, although he did bring lots of veg and eggs from the campo……and this is an example of his kindness when drunk. …a few years ago I fell almost outside his door and ripped all the ligaments etc., off my ankle. There I was, this foreign woman, sitting in the street, howling in pain, tears streaming down my face, and he came out and was at a complete loss as to what to do with me. It was obvious that he wanted to help me and he said the first thing that came into his head…….’Did I want an egg?’ At that time, no I didn’t really. But on me saying me, the offer was upped to two eggs. After some serious negotiations, I settled for 6 and away he went to put them in his pockets so they wouldn’t get broken. As I say, when sober………
It was only last year that the Police first seemed to get involved. I went up our cul-de-sac one morning, turned the corner, puddles of blood, bloody hand prints all down the street. Someone, i.e. a drinking friend, had knocked on their door in the early hours, Pepe had hit him on the head with a frying pan…..as one does! In circumstances like this best if the Police are kept informed! The blood stayed there for a couple of days until one of the Spanish neighbours gave it a good scrub. Pepe was taken off for a few hours and on his return up came the mate with head cleaned up, they made up and off they all went. Since then the drinking, both of them, has continued, the rows have carried on, Lola seems to have been in and out of hospital and looked worse all the time. Pepe has been talking to the walls, the road and anyone who happened to be passing.
It all came to a head last Wednesday night. I put out rubbish out at the top of the street and was surprised to see a load of women sitting on the stoop in front of Pepe’s door, all talking. I immediately thought ‘My God some body’s dying’ as it is the custom when death is close for people to sit outside houses (if one didn’t know one was at deaths door, you soon would when all these people suddenly turned up and sat or stood outside your front door). Anyway, I thought no more of it until coming back from shopping the next day to see two Guardia Civil Officers outside Pepe’s door.
It seems as if the evening before he was his normal drunken self, had come home, knocked Lola out of bed (and because of her continuing ill health, she was now sleeping in a hospital bed in the front room, just inside the door), smashed her head on the floor. This time not the local Police came, but the Guardia, Injunction Order imposed, Pepe is now banished to the Campo for the next 3 months, Lola has been stitched up and peace and quiet now reigns in the street. But for how long? When he is ‘in his cups’ up in the campo, do the Guardia really believe he will not get on his moped and make a visit to his wife?
To me, this is all part of my life here in Torrox Pueblo, especially as we live up in the older part of the village. Life is out on the streets here, loud and for everyone to see and hear! I really wish my Spanish was better!





